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TOP TEN LIST You know it, you love it, you can't live without it: the revolutionary comedy bit that won Dave the Nobel Peace Prize. Check out the latest Top Ten List here.
TOP TEN ARCHIVES Old Top Ten Lists never die, they just get archived. The Top Ten Archives is searchable by date and keyword. Also, please note that the word "archives" contains the word "chives."
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WAHOO GAZETTE LATE SHOW staffer Mike McIntee gives you a daily show summary and the behind-the-scenes lowdown with his daily Wahoo Gazette. So much juicy inside information that you'll say "Wahoo!"
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
Ricky Gervais; Forest Whitaker; and The Shins.
PLUS: Ayman al-Zawahiri; Thrilling Academy Award Nominated Moment; Great Moments in Presidential Speeches; a Top Ten List; It’s A Fact! With George Clarke; What’s in the Pantsuit?; and Slim Pickens.
Dave’s got a bit of a squeaky voice tonight. He sounds like Slim Pickens.
Last Saturday, Hillary Clinton announced her plans to run for the Presidency in 2008. In honor of the historic announcement, tonight we will be heading over to Rupert’s Hello Deli to play “What’s In The Pantsuit?”
The camera travels into the famed deli from 53rd Street, but not before we catch a glimpse of the marquee under the Hello Deli canopy. What was the Hello Deli called before it was the Hello Deli? The Preview Sandwich Shop.
We find Rupert inside dressed in a lovely and tasteful rouge pantsuit over a white blouse. Rupert scurries outside to find a contestant.
The Academy Award nominations were announced this morning, which inspired us to put this together: “Thrilling Academy Award-Nominated Moment.”
We see a scene from The Departed, nominated for Best Picture. In a tense thrilling moment, Matt Damon says “Really.”
In the latest videotaped message from al-Qaeda, Ayman al-Zawahiri brazenly mocked President Bush. If you haven’t seen it yet, Dave offers it up to the viewing audience.
We see al-Zawahiri. He says in a mocking tone:
- “Ahem, President Bush: Yo’ mama is so old, her Social Security number is 3.”
- “Yo’ mama is so old, when she was in school, there was no history class”
- “Yo’ mama is so old, she knew the Burger King when he was still a prince.”
- “Yo’ mama is so old, her birth certificate is in Roman numerals.”
- “Yo’ mama is so old, she was a waitress at the Last Supper.”
- “That’s all for now. See you next time, everybody.”
Back to Rupert’s who is with a young lovely named Erin. She is from Colton, New York and is a waitress at Angelo’s Restaurant. As Dave and Erin chit chat, Rupert does some adjusting to his outfit. “Troubles there, Rupert?” asks Dave. Rupert responds with a sigh, “It’s a little tight.”
This is how we play the game: Under Rupert’s pantsuit is a mystery item. Erin will have 30 seconds to manually examine the item and try to determine what it is. We put up the 30-second clock and Erin has a go at it. She finds the item under the back of the pantsuit jacket. She feels and massages and squeezes the item. Time is up and time for her guess. Dave says, “You certainly had a pretty good feel” Her guess? Erin says, “Is it a sub sandwich?” No, it is not. Dave offers a hint: “It is some kind of meat.” Erin muses a moment: “roast beef?” No, once again. The band adds an extra “wah wah wah wah” to accompany the buzz. Dave hints a little more: “It’s a cut of meat.” “Steak” answers Erin with a question. Nope. More funny “wah wah” from the trumpets and trombone. What is the mysterious item under the pantsuit? It is veal shank.
And that’s how we play “What’s Under the Pantsuit?”
GREAT MOMENT IN PRESIDENTIAL SPEECHES:
We see FDR. We see JFK. We see George W. Bush: “It’s ehh uhh. . . . uhh. . . elections . . . uhh wah wah wah . . . “
TOP TEN: Surprises in George W. Bush’s State of the Union Address. Earlier tonight, George W. Bush gave his 7th State of the Union Address. Last year, he spoke for 51 minutes and was interrupted for applause 61 times. An estimated 41 million watch his speech in 2006.
To read the entire Top Ten, click on the Top Ten under Last Night On The Late Show. #10. Wore a “Hillary in 2008” T-Shirt. #8. Vowed to end America’s dependence on foreign films.
RICKY GERVAIS: From the very popular HBO series, “Extras”, Sundays at 10:00 PM. Ricky set a world record for hits on a podcast . . . or most down-loaded, or something like that. His “Ricky Gervais Show” was the most down-loaded podcast in the world. And he’s also set a record for the fastest selling comedy tour in Britain: 100,000 tickets sold in nine minutes - - - and what makes this so amazing is that he sold these tickets door-to-door.
Being on such a big concert tour with so much money is involved, he was forced to get a physical to make sure he wasn’t going to die. So the doctor did a quick check up and then told Ricky to drop his pants. He did, but unfortunately he had a “wet patch.” Oops.
And he knew exactly the moment the doctor spotted the wet spot. The doctor did a double and then triple take without trying to make it obvious. Ricky demonstrates this in a very humorous manner.
How are things on the show Extras? Dave finds the program very entertaining. This is the 2nd season of Extras; the first season only consisting of only 6 episodes. Ricky admits he’s not very prolific.
In one episode of Extras, Ricky’s character Andy is asked for his autograph. The person asking has worked with “Andy” for the past few days. Unfortunately, Andy doesn’t know the guy’s name. Hmmm, awkward. Andy asks, “Who do I make it out to?” The guy says “Me.” Well, that was no help. “Andy” follows with “And how do you spell your name exactly?” The guy answers, “R O B.”
This actually happened to Ricky in real life. He frequented a bar and the barkeep called him Steve and Ricky never got around to correcting him. Of course after a while, it got too far into the relationship to correct the bartender. And then one day Ricky is at the bar with a friend and the friend calls him “Ricky.” The bartender is surprised and says,
“Ricky? I’ve been calling you ‘Steve’ for 3 years.” Gervais responds, “Have you?” Yup. That’s sounds about right.
Dave thanks Ricky for flying across the Atlantic to be on the show. Flying that distance must be tiring. Ricky says it isn’t that bad when you fly First Class, but the thing about First Class is it is so much more expensive. He feels that it’s so expensive that if there is going to be a crash, the front of the plane (First Class) should shoot off and land safely miles from the accident. It’s only right.
Working on Night at the Museum, Ricky got his first taste of Hollywood. The director asked on the set if he is comfortable and if the trailer is OK. Ricky exclaimed, “The trailer is bigger than my hotel room!” The director says, “Do you want a bigger room?”
Ricky says he could easily get used to this. Extras on HBO – Look for it Sunday nights at 10:00 PM
FOREST WHITAKER: Earlier today, Forest was nominated for an Academy Award for his role as Idi Amin in The Last King of Scotland. He was backstage at the Today show when the category came up and his name was the last to be announced. It was nerve racking and very exciting. Last week, Forest won a Golden Globe.
What was it like to be Idi Amin? Forest says he was complex in that he was always a very social guy who really didn’t want to be President. He was a soldier who only wanted to be a soldier. And as President, he soon learned he could not trust anyone around him. At one time 11 different camps in Uganda were trying to overthrow the government and have him assassinated. He reacted as a soldier would and resisted with force.
Here’s a fun fact: The Last King of Scotland is the first film to be shot in Uganda since 1951’s The African Queen. The Last King of Scotland opens nationwide this Friday. It’s one film that’s on my list I don’t want to miss.
Academy Award nominations for Actor in a Leading Role Forest Whitaker: The Last King of Scotland Leonardo DiCaprio: Blood Diamond Ryan Gosling: Half Nelson Peter O’Toole: Venus Will Smith: The Pursuit of Happyness
It’s time once again for a popular segment on the Late Show; “It’s A Fact! With George Clarke.”
We see a bloodied George Clarke. George: “If you’re not allowed in Forest Whitaker’s dressing room, don’t get caught in Forest Whitaker’s dressing room . . . It’s a Fact!”
ACT 5: Alan: “It’s time for Alan Kalter’s ‘Life Lessons!’ Remember, everyone, food is the fuel our body needs, so kick-start your day with a well-balanced breakfast! Also, nothing beats loneliness like the company of a whore.
This has been Alan Kalter’s ‘Life Lessons!’”
THE SHINS: From their highly anticipated new CD, “Wincing the Night Away”, The Shins performed “Turn On Me.”
They reminded me a bit of the Black 47s . . . and that’s a good thing.
And that was our show for Tuesday January 23, 2007.
Is Bush nuts? No wonder his approval ratings are in the dumpster. Doesn’t he realize he canceled American Idol here in New York?
I have all these good ideas that are never picked up. For instance, Tuesday morning’s announcement of the Academy Award nominations sparked this idea. The TV Emmy Awards should have a category for Best Acceptance Speech in a Major Televised Awards Show. It could make Award shows a bit more interesting.
Even though it’s not been nominated for any Academy Awards and has nothing to do with the movies, I’m picking “High School Musical” to win Best Picture. Nothing has impressed me more this year.
I have a new game to play that I just discovered this morning. I’m not sure if I saw it right, only catching it out the corner of my eye and ear. At the top of The Rachael Ray Show this morning, the audience gave the most tepid standing ovation I have ever seen. Check it out tomorrow. I will be checking to see if I saw and heard what I think I saw and heard. It was a very unenthusiastic response even though the audience was standing. When Rachael said “Thank you”, everyone quickly stopped and sat down. I chuckled at the abruptness. I look forward to tomorrow’s open.
From today’s USA Today – January 23, 2007:
“Web Watch
•The Late Show With David Letterman website (cbs.com/latenight/lateshow) now feautres video clips, monologues and a weekly online series starring cue-card man Tony Mendez.”
I guess the USA Today didn’t see The Wahoo Gazette, the longest running television blog on the internet. I was blogging before there was a word “blog.” Pshaw, USA Today... and by the way, you spelt “features” wrong. That would never happen in The Wahoo Gazette.
How did they miss the Wahoo Gazette? I guess that’s what happens when you’re under the fold.
Do you watch Grey’s Anatomy? I don’t, but I have seen bits and pieces over the past few seasons. I notice that whenever I watch the show, the Meredith Grey is always on the verge of tears. It always seems to be something. I haven’t seen a TV character be this teary since Abby, the mom on Eight is Enough.
CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
From Moses Lake, Washington, it’s Bill Kalles This concludes another episode of CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
Ricky Gervais; Forest Whitaker; and The Shins.
PLUS: Ayman al-Zawahiri; Thrilling Academy Award Nominated Moment; Great Moments in Presidential Speeches; a Top Ten List; It’s A Fact! With George Clarke; What’s in the Pantsuit?; and Slim Pickens.
Dave’s got a bit of a squeaky voice tonight. He sounds like Slim Pickens.
Last Saturday, Hillary Clinton announced her plans to run for the Presidency in 2008. In honor of the historic announcement, tonight we will be heading over to Rupert’s Hello Deli to play “What’s In The Pantsuit?”
The camera travels into the famed deli from 53rd Street, but not before we catch a glimpse of the marquee under the Hello Deli canopy. What was the Hello Deli called before it was the Hello Deli? The Preview Sandwich Shop.
We find Rupert inside dressed in a lovely and tasteful rouge pantsuit over a white blouse. Rupert scurries outside to find a contestant.
The Academy Award nominations were announced this morning, which inspired us to put this together: “Thrilling Academy Award-Nominated Moment.”
We see a scene from The Departed, nominated for Best Picture. In a tense thrilling moment, Matt Damon says “Really.”
In the latest videotaped message from al-Qaeda, Ayman al-Zawahiri brazenly mocked President Bush. If you haven’t seen it yet, Dave offers it up to the viewing audience.
We see al-Zawahiri. He says in a mocking tone:
- “Ahem, President Bush: Yo’ mama is so old, her Social Security number is 3.”
- “Yo’ mama is so old, when she was in school, there was no history class”
- “Yo’ mama is so old, she knew the Burger King when he was still a prince.”
- “Yo’ mama is so old, her birth certificate is in Roman numerals.”
- “Yo’ mama is so old, she was a waitress at the Last Supper.”
- “That’s all for now. See you next time, everybody.”
Back to Rupert’s who is with a young lovely named Erin. She is from Colton, New York and is a waitress at Angelo’s Restaurant. As Dave and Erin chit chat, Rupert does some adjusting to his outfit. “Troubles there, Rupert?” asks Dave. Rupert responds with a sigh, “It’s a little tight.”
This is how we play the game: Under Rupert’s pantsuit is a mystery item. Erin will have 30 seconds to manually examine the item and try to determine what it is. We put up the 30-second clock and Erin has a go at it. She finds the item under the back of the pantsuit jacket. She feels and massages and squeezes the item. Time is up and time for her guess. Dave says, “You certainly had a pretty good feel” Her guess? Erin says, “Is it a sub sandwich?” No, it is not. Dave offers a hint: “It is some kind of meat.” Erin muses a moment: “roast beef?” No, once again. The band adds an extra “wah wah wah wah” to accompany the buzz. Dave hints a little more: “It’s a cut of meat.” “Steak” answers Erin with a question. Nope. More funny “wah wah” from the trumpets and trombone. What is the mysterious item under the pantsuit? It is veal shank.
And that’s how we play “What’s Under the Pantsuit?”
GREAT MOMENT IN PRESIDENTIAL SPEECHES:
We see FDR. We see JFK. We see George W. Bush: “It’s ehh uhh. . . . uhh. . . elections . . . uhh wah wah wah . . . “
TOP TEN: Surprises in George W. Bush’s State of the Union Address. Earlier tonight, George W. Bush gave his 7th State of the Union Address. Last year, he spoke for 51 minutes and was interrupted for applause 61 times. An estimated 41 million watch his speech in 2006.
To read the entire Top Ten, click on the Top Ten under Last Night On The Late Show. #10. Wore a “Hillary in 2008” T-Shirt. #8. Vowed to end America’s dependence on foreign films.
RICKY GERVAIS: From the very popular HBO series, “Extras”, Sundays at 10:00 PM. Ricky set a world record for hits on a podcast . . . or most down-loaded, or something like that. His “Ricky Gervais Show” was the most down-loaded podcast in the world. And he’s also set a record for the fastest selling comedy tour in Britain: 100,000 tickets sold in nine minutes - - - and what makes this so amazing is that he sold these tickets door-to-door.
Being on such a big concert tour with so much money is involved, he was forced to get a physical to make sure he wasn’t going to die. So the doctor did a quick check up and then told Ricky to drop his pants. He did, but unfortunately he had a “wet patch.” Oops.
And he knew exactly the moment the doctor spotted the wet spot. The doctor did a double and then triple take without trying to make it obvious. Ricky demonstrates this in a very humorous manner.
How are things on the show Extras? Dave finds the program very entertaining. This is the 2nd season of Extras; the first season only consisting of only 6 episodes. Ricky admits he’s not very prolific.
In one episode of Extras, Ricky’s character Andy is asked for his autograph. The person asking has worked with “Andy” for the past few days. Unfortunately, Andy doesn’t know the guy’s name. Hmmm, awkward. Andy asks, “Who do I make it out to?” The guy says “Me.” Well, that was no help. “Andy” follows with “And how do you spell your name exactly?” The guy answers, “R O B.”
This actually happened to Ricky in real life. He frequented a bar and the barkeep called him Steve and Ricky never got around to correcting him. Of course after a while, it got too far into the relationship to correct the bartender. And then one day Ricky is at the bar with a friend and the friend calls him “Ricky.” The bartender is surprised and says,
“Ricky? I’ve been calling you ‘Steve’ for 3 years.” Gervais responds, “Have you?” Yup. That’s sounds about right.
Dave thanks Ricky for flying across the Atlantic to be on the show. Flying that distance must be tiring. Ricky says it isn’t that bad when you fly First Class, but the thing about First Class is it is so much more expensive. He feels that it’s so expensive that if there is going to be a crash, the front of the plane (First Class) should shoot off and land safely miles from the accident. It’s only right.
Working on Night at the Museum, Ricky got his first taste of Hollywood. The director asked on the set if he is comfortable and if the trailer is OK. Ricky exclaimed, “The trailer is bigger than my hotel room!” The director says, “Do you want a bigger room?”
Ricky says he could easily get used to this. Extras on HBO – Look for it Sunday nights at 10:00 PM
FOREST WHITAKER: Earlier today, Forest was nominated for an Academy Award for his role as Idi Amin in The Last King of Scotland. He was backstage at the Today show when the category came up and his name was the last to be announced. It was nerve racking and very exciting. Last week, Forest won a Golden Globe.
What was it like to be Idi Amin? Forest says he was complex in that he was always a very social guy who really didn’t want to be President. He was a soldier who only wanted to be a soldier. And as President, he soon learned he could not trust anyone around him. At one time 11 different camps in Uganda were trying to overthrow the government and have him assassinated. He reacted as a soldier would and resisted with force.
Here’s a fun fact: The Last King of Scotland is the first film to be shot in Uganda since 1951’s The African Queen. The Last King of Scotland opens nationwide this Friday. It’s one film that’s on my list I don’t want to miss.
Academy Award nominations for Actor in a Leading Role Forest Whitaker: The Last King of Scotland Leonardo DiCaprio: Blood Diamond Ryan Gosling: Half Nelson Peter O’Toole: Venus Will Smith: The Pursuit of Happyness
It’s time once again for a popular segment on the Late Show; “It’s A Fact! With George Clarke.”
We see a bloodied George Clarke. George: “If you’re not allowed in Forest Whitaker’s dressing room, don’t get caught in Forest Whitaker’s dressing room . . . It’s a Fact!”
ACT 5: Alan: “It’s time for Alan Kalter’s ‘Life Lessons!’ Remember, everyone, food is the fuel our body needs, so kick-start your day with a well-balanced breakfast! Also, nothing beats loneliness like the company of a whore.
This has been Alan Kalter’s ‘Life Lessons!’”
THE SHINS: From their highly anticipated new CD, “Wincing the Night Away”, The Shins performed “Turn On Me.”
They reminded me a bit of the Black 47s . . . and that’s a good thing.
And that was our show for Tuesday January 23, 2007.
Is Bush nuts? No wonder his approval ratings are in the dumpster. Doesn’t he realize he canceled American Idol here in New York?
I have all these good ideas that are never picked up. For instance, Tuesday morning’s announcement of the Academy Award nominations sparked this idea. The TV Emmy Awards should have a category for Best Acceptance Speech in a Major Televised Awards Show. It could make Award shows a bit more interesting.
Even though it’s not been nominated for any Academy Awards and has nothing to do with the movies, I’m picking “High School Musical” to win Best Picture. Nothing has impressed me more this year.
I have a new game to play that I just discovered this morning. I’m not sure if I saw it right, only catching it out the corner of my eye and ear. At the top of The Rachael Ray Show this morning, the audience gave the most tepid standing ovation I have ever seen. Check it out tomorrow. I will be checking to see if I saw and heard what I think I saw and heard. It was a very unenthusiastic response even though the audience was standing. When Rachael said “Thank you”, everyone quickly stopped and sat down. I chuckled at the abruptness. I look forward to tomorrow’s open.
From today’s USA Today – January 23, 2007:
“Web Watch
•The Late Show With David Letterman website (cbs.com/latenight/lateshow) now feautres video clips, monologues and a weekly online series starring cue-card man Tony Mendez.”
I guess the USA Today didn’t see The Wahoo Gazette, the longest running television blog on the internet. I was blogging before there was a word “blog.” Pshaw, USA Today... and by the way, you spelt “features” wrong. That would never happen in The Wahoo Gazette.
How did they miss the Wahoo Gazette? I guess that’s what happens when you’re under the fold.
Do you watch Grey’s Anatomy? I don’t, but I have seen bits and pieces over the past few seasons. I notice that whenever I watch the show, the Meredith Grey is always on the verge of tears. It always seems to be something. I haven’t seen a TV character be this teary since Abby, the mom on Eight is Enough.
CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
From Moses Lake, Washington, it’s Bill Kalles This concludes another episode of CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
ACT 1 • Show Open • Dave's Monologue Watch now • Thrilling Academy Award-Nominated Moment • Zawahiri Mocks Bush • What's Under the Pantsuit? • Great Moments in Presidential Speeches
ACT 2 • Top Ten Surprises in George W. Bush's State of the Union Address Read now
